Personal Foul

Ed Hochuli Is Doing His Best Phil Luckett Impersonation

This Thursday's Thanksgiving marks the lucky 13th anniversary since NFL referee Phil Luckett blew a simple but easily overlooked call, costing a team the game.

No, it wasn't the holding penalty that removed Darrell Jackson's Seattle touchdown off the board in Superbowl XL eventually proving to be the difference in score in the game-- that was referee Bill Leavy (he deserves his own article). 

It was referee Phil Luckett, and it was a coin toss. A coin toss? A coin toss.

In an overtimegame in 1998, Steelers running back Jerome Bettis stepped to the 50 yard line to call the coin toss, hoping to give his team the opportunity to get the ball and win the game. The cameras focused in and Luckett flicked the coin in the air. Bettis yelled  "hea--tails!"

It was tails.

Millions of television viewers clearly heard Bettis call tails. The crowd sitting hundreds of feet away heard Bettis call tails. Helen Keller heard Bettis call tails. Referee Phil Luckett heard heads.

The ball was awarded to Detroit and the Lions won the game.

Blind, deaf, and mute-- Helen Keller still knew it was tails.

Luckett was also responsible for the Music City Miracle, and the 2001 Get out of the way play. Either of those references can be found on Wikipedia-- or on thousands of Phil Luckett death-threat letters collected by the FBI.

When Luckett retired following the 2007 season it left a void in the hearts and minds of aspiring snipers across the country looking to make their mark. What would the NFL be without controversial calls? The NFL knew its fans wouldn't be able to accept the fact their team just plain stinks-- there needed to be a new scape-goat. The league office scrambled to find a replacement. Enter Ed Hochuli.

In 2008 Hochuli met with Commissioner Roger Goodell at the NFL league office.
Goodell ordered Hochuli to fill the shoes of referee Phil Luckett.

There is no question that NFL referees have a difficult job. Their job is like trying to dissect an atom while running across the 405 freeway. But I long for the days of fewer penalties and less referee interference.


Like when a silent-but-violent fart slips out in a crowded room, uncertain officials used to just pretend that nothing happened and let the game play out-- but no more. NFL officials are under explicit direction from the league office to throw the yellow flag if there is any question in their mind at all there was an infraction-- even if there wasn't one. The theory is it's better to throw the flag and be wrong then to not throw it at all-- unless your a player or one of 50 million spectators. It's officially listed in the league rule-book as the whoever smelt it dealt it rule.

NFL senior analyst Pat Kirwan did a study last week on the rise in penalties in the league since 2005, because these penalties are not only costly for the teams involved, but they're driving fans like me crazy.

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/09000d5d8242fc95/article/pass-interference-holding-penalties-on-the-rise-in-the-nfl is the link to that article if you want to read more about trends in penalties. It's fascinating but appalling.

***

This isn't an article about penalties-- or referees-- although I hate both of them. This is about one referee I really hate because he seems to blow more calls than the others--Ed Hochuli. I would never say any of this to his face, he would kick my ass, so I'm blogging it to my loyal readership of 3 people.

In case you don't recognize him by name, Hochuli is the super-jacked white ref. He's also the ref that was suspended 5 games in 2007 for using HGH. That's right-- an official suspended for juice. His guns are sweet, but they seem to be affecting his brain.

Starting Official!!
 Hochuli put on 35 lbs. of muscle in one summer, becoming a starting official.
He celebrated by smashing his head through car windows.

Hochuli wanted to start strong because Phil Luckett left quite a legacy, and it would be difficult to live up to it. In 2008, Hochuli's first attempt was a smashing success.




9/14/2008. The Denver Broncos, led by QB Jay Cutler and down by 7 points, had been successfully driving the ball against the Chargers in the final minutes of the game. With the ball on the SD 1 yard line and 1:17 left on the game clock-- Hochuli went to work.

Cutler took the snap, dropping back in the pocket looking to throw a pass. He saw his target, cocked-back his rocket-arm, and let it rip. Little-leaguers everywhere can identify with what happened next.

As Cutler threw, the ball slipped out of his hand, falling behind him and hitting the turf. In football 101, it's what's called a fumble (unless you're the Raiders-- see the Tuck Rule). The fumble was recovered by the Chargers' linebacker Tim Dobbins and the game was over. Easy call-- right?


Hochuli looked as confused as an Asian woman attempting to parallel-park.

Hochuli ruled it an incomplete pass and blew the play dead, awarding Denver possession. Replay showed it was clearly a fumble. The world saw-- it was a fumble. Even Hochuli saw it was a fumble, and apologized to SD Head Coach Norv Turner. But there was nothing he could do, the whistle had been blown and the play was dead.

Mickey-no-eyes saw it was a fumble.

Replay at the time didn't allow possession to be awarded to another team once the play had been blown dead from an incomplete pass-- even if replay clearly showed it was a fumble. The league changed that stupid rule right after the season.

Score: Hochuli 1 - Luckett 3.

December 5, 2010. Trailing 17-20 to the Detroit Lions, the Chicago Bears and their newly acquired QB Jay Cutler were driving in the 4th quarter. At the Detroit 22 yard-line Cutler dropped back to pass. With nothing down-field Cutler scrambled. Frightening defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh chased him down. Suh, from behind, pushed down Cutler after an 8 yard scramble. Great play. Ed Hochuli. Yellow flag. For an "unnecessary non-football act" Suh was given a 15 yard personal foul and the drive was kept alive. Chicago won the game 24-20. 

Score: Hochuli 2 - Luckett 3

January 3, 2010. Playoffs. Chris Johnson became only the 6th player in NFL history to rush for over 2,000 yards in a season. Johnson joined the elite ranks of Eric Dickerson, Jamal Lewis, Terrell Davis, Barry Sanders, and O.J. Simpson.

Including this game against Seattle, Johnson had rushed for over 100 yards in 11 straight games. In this game, on the big playoff stage and a national television audience, Johnson was again over 100 yards and had 2 touchdowns to go along with it. Chris Johnson was quickly closing in on Dickerson's all-time single-season rushing record of 2,105 yards.

Johnson ripped-off a 62 yard TD to bring him within 52 yards of the all-time record. Teammates and fans alike celebrated. Hardly anyone noticed the flag that had been thrown all the way back near the line of scrimmage. Holding on Tennessee's Ahmard Hall, and the play came back. Titans center pleaded with Hochuli that it was a routine block. No rushing record for Johnson. Hochuli had struck again.

Score: Hochuli 3 - Luckett 3 Overtime

November 20, 2011. Just yesterday I'm watching the Redskins overtime drive at home against the Cowboys. The Redskins' Graham Gano lined up for the game-winning 52 yard attempt. The Redskins are about to snap the ball then the whistle blows-- seemingly a tactic frequently used by opponents in an attempt to "freeze" the kicker.

Ed Hochuli turns to the camera and turns on his mic, "Please reset the game-clock to 9:30 seconds, and the play-clock to :10 seconds."

I could understand him stopping the game if there was a critical clock mistake-- But 9:30 with left in overtime and the kicker already lined up for the kick? The clock still showed 9:21 left in the game so it wasn't like 6 minutes had disappeared.

After the clock gets adjusted, the Redskins line up once again. Whistle-- time-out Cowboys. The second freezing of the kicker.

The Redskins line up a third time and the kick sails wide-right.

The Cowboys drive down the field and win the game.

Final Score: Hochuli 4 (and counting) - Luckett 3